Please don’t call, talk to me or stand too close.  My arms may fly, I may gasp and mean comments are bound to fly out of my mouth.   The time has come for me to shut out the rest of the world and watch American Idol.  My computer is on my lap, and I’m ready to let you all know how the contestants did.  Thoughts on the episode can be seen below:

Tonight’s theme: Contestants Choice of a Popular Download on iTunes.  Cool.  There is finally a new theme.

I haven’t been able to watch the past few episodes because I was bogged down, so this first thought may be completely pointless…but why is it that the judges came out of the center screen and paraded around like cattle?  Unnecessary much?   

As I understand it, these contestants have costume designers, makeup artists, ya know, just people to help them look good.  What were Megan Joy and Allison Iraheta wearing?  I would cry if I was told to wear that.

Anoop: Love him.  I love unexpected artists.  During the auditions, Simon constantly made jokes about how he should be fixing computers rather than standing in front of the judges panel.  Yes, he looked like a total nerd, but then he sang the Boyz II Men hit “Thank You” and completely shocked them.  I decided that day that he was one of my favs.  Today’s performance, however, made me question whether or not he could have the honor of being one of my Idol loves.  He sang Usher’s “Caught Up” and didn’t do it all that well….  It pains me to say it, but he actually sounded bad in the beginning.  I agree with Simon, it was nearly awful.  Come on, Anoop.  Go back to what you used to do.

Megan: Take off one of those necklaces, please.  You look like you’re playing dressup.  Also, was the random braid/twist thing in your hair because you sang Bob Marley?  I’ve never been a huge Megan fan.  I think she’s gorgeous and she definitely has a different voice, but I just don’t feel that she’s set for this competition.  Her rendition of “Turn Your Lights Down Low” sounded a bit like Judy Garland trying to sing a Bob Marley song.  It was just…awkward.  I’m all for artists doing new things, but when your voice doesn’t work on a certain song, please stop.

Danny: Ohhh myyy Goddd.  “What Hurts the Most” by Rascal Flatts is only one of my favorite songs.  Can’t wait to hear such a talented guy sing it.  Fun fact: “I” is a very hard word to start singing on.  It just doesn’t sit right for most people.  Sadly, it didn’t sit right for Danny Gokey on the opening line, either.  However, that was the only bit that didn’t quite work for good ol’ Danny boy.  He did amazingly well.  There are a few people that just have “it.”  They can perform, they have stage presence, and they keep the audience engaged.  I loved how he took a country pop song and somehow turned it into a light rock piece.  I felt like I was listening to a radio station that has some cheesy little name with the word “light” in it.  Cue random girl singing an obnoxious jingle.  Thanks so much, Danny.  I was starting to question whether or not the vast majority of America was tone deaf.

Allison:  Geez.  I thought she just needed a new costume designer, but she definitely needs a hair artist, too.  I fear that she might be housing small rodents in that next of hers.  Musicall, Allison Iraheta doesn’t mess up.  She, along with Anoop, is an unexpected artist.  I don’t expect to hear a strong rock sounding voice to come out of a 16-year-old’s mouth.  I guess I should start expecting it when it comes to her.  She sang “Don’t Speak” better than Gwen Stefani did.  OH MY GOD THANK YOU, RANDY, FOR MAKING FUN OF HER OUTFIT!  I thought I was alone in the world.  Happy Halloween, Allison.  Next year please try not to dress up as a rocker chick.  You already have that identity down.  

Scott:  I’m anxious to hear this performance.  During his first audition, I absolutely loved him.  Now, I feel as though he’s just…ok.  Perhaps he will prove me wrong this week.  “Just the Way You Are” by Billy Joel.  When he loosens up, his voice is amazing.  He has a tendency to press certain notes that are bigger parts of the song.  When that happens, he dips down and goes a bit flat, all while scooping and scraping to find the next note.  There were moments of brilliance in this performance…when he wasn’t doing the whole scooping and scraping thing.  He needs to keep in mind that this song is gentle.  He doesn’t need to be that strong on certain notes!  Overall, he did a great job.  At this point, I’d say he was better than Megan and Anoop for sure.  I’m going to have to agree with Simon; this was definitely one of Scott’s best performances.  

Matt: Matt=amazing.  The Fray=amazing.  I’m excited.  He has chosen to sing “You Found Me” by The Fray.  Oh, happy day!  What I love about Matt is how different his voice is.  He has found a way to mesh rock and R&B into all of his songs.  If Chris Daughtry and Ryan Tedder had a love child, it would be Matt Giraud.  This week’s performance exemplifies that particular relationship perfectly.  At the beginning of the song, his voice was a bit harsher, full of raspy points and forced phrases.  However, he ended it with an Elliot Yamine-esque riff.  His falsetto always amazes me, and none of his riffs or improvisations sound sinew.  The judges didn’t like him.  Yikes.  Go, America!  Help keep him in the competition.

Lil: The best word to describe Lil Rounds would have to be adorable.  This week, Miss Adorable has chosen to sing “I Surrender” by Celine Dion.  I’m anxious to hear how this goes.  Both Celine and Lil have huge voices, but they’re totally different.  (Sidenote: Once again, the costume designers have failed.  Her dress is too small!)  Ok, back on track.  I agree with Randy.  I don’t think that this song was the best choice for her.  Ahhh!  Her family came on stage?  So cute.  Unfair, though.  Not every contestant has an adorable little kid to steal the hearts of the voters.

Adam: Adam is my favorite contestant.  Yes, I have called other artists some of my favs.  Here is the difference: I have multiple favorites, but Adam is THE favorite.  He always has a surprise up his sleeve.  This week’s surprise?  His song choice.  “Play that Funky Music” by Wild Cherry.  Whaaat?  This particular arrangement of the song made me feel like I was watching him in a broadway show rather than in concert.  I’m not sure how I feel about that.  Love you, Adam, but you need to get a grasp on your venues.  Ah, another surprise.  Paula just put him in the same category as Mick Jagger and Steven Tyler.   Boy, do I know how to pick ’em or what?

Kris: For once in my life, words escape me.  His performance was…flawless.